Happy New Year!!!!!11

December 10, I celebrated my 4/5 year anniversary (4 years married, 5 years “together”) with Crabby. I surprised him with some boudoir photos I had turned into an album and we chillaxed at a hotel with this view:

Later that month, I graduated with my muhfuckin Master of Arts degree in Sociology

We had been talking about buying a house, but we ultimately decided that when we buy, it’s not just the house that matters, but the location. We could easily buy a house in the suburbs for what Houston houses are going for, but I realized I want no parts of suburb life. I hate driving which means I hate commuting. So the closer in to the city, the better. Of course the price increases the closer you get, but we are willing to wait to get what we want and not settle. It’s interesting how many people seem disappointed we haven’t bought yet, which shows me just having a house no matter where it is is what matters to a lot of people. Well, I’m not buying a house just to have a house. Fuck that, son.

So we moved into a really nice apartment where we feel comfortable staying until we are ready to buy what we want. We moved on NEW YEAR’S EVE and then had the nerve to go party that night and go to IHOP that was packed and not get back until 4AM the next day, then got up and finished the moving process.

I would not recommend this to anyone. So as a result, we still don’t feel completely settled yet, hence the long-ass break in blogging. In the midst of packing, I tackled our “change box” that was full of coins that stacked up over the years. I ended up with $35 worth of coins after I took them to the bank O_O and found a purple penny. Even my coins are cunty.

We didn’t have any living/dining room furniture so I have been in full-on nest mode. I want a jewel-toned feel for the rooms anchored with a deep, dark, plum-purple as the base color. We got a custom sofa and ottoman in deep, dark, plum-purple and goldenrod respectively, and I threw in my Indian jewel-toned pillows for now:

I ordered some soft gold curtains and am deciding on a rug now to round things out.

I also picked up a deep purple accent chair from World Market (it was on sale for 50% off!), seen in the picture below. Also, see the pink chair in the background? I got 4 of them on Craigslist for $100 total. They will be used for the dining room.

I will be getting the pink chairs re-covered in this fabric:

I have some curtains in a rosy-coppery color coming in for the dining room and am still deciding on a rug.

You saw the doggies in the living room picture so they’ve been chillin like a villain and Max has been chillin in the cut, lording over paper towel rolls like so:

Also, remember this? Well shout-out to my girl Desiree for paying forward her ovulation predictor kits. I started using them this month. When you get a smiley face, that tells you the hormones present right before ovulation are detected, so GET BUSY. I got my smiley face Monday so now is the waiting game. We’ll see what happens, no pressure, no stress. Thanks again Desiree and Keana for letting me vent my cray-cray minicorn related thoughts. I also started a chart where you chart your basal temperature every morning, and certain dips and increases during certain days tell you about where you are in your cycle. That ish is FASCINATING. I am learning so much about how my body works through that.

This year will see the birth of my very first nephew or niece, and I will be a bridesmaid in my stepmother’s wedding. 3 times I will have bridesmaided it up. Lawd, the graveyard of dresses…

Grouchy Cat

Peeped at Alicia’s

All Black Penguin

In what has been described as a “one in a zillion kind of mutation,” biologists say that the animal has lost control of its pigmentation, an occurrence that is extremely rare. While multicolored birds will often show some variation, Dr. Baker explains that what makes this all-black King Penguin so rare is that the bird’s melanin deposits have occurred where they are typically not present — enough so that no light feathers even checker the bird’s normally white chest. All-black penguins are so rare there is practically no research on the subject — biologists guess that perhaps one in every quarter million of penguins shows evidence of at least partial melanism, whereas the penguin we saw appears to be almost entirely (if not entirely) melanistic.

Peeped here.

Caption This #1

Topaz and Max Omarion Tupac Boycatt Lopez-Ramirez

I may not know karate but I know karazay, bish!

There’s my caption, let’s see yours!

Cat

So, on our anniversary night Crabby went to help his cousin with something and upon leaving saw a cat meowing loudly and trying to pick stuff off the ground to eat, and just generally looking adorable. He couldn’t leave him out there so he brought him home.

The cat looked generally healthy and had no collar/tags; by it’s temperament it clearly was a housecat. He made a late-night run to get some food and a litter box.

The next day we took it to the Humane Society to get checked out and learned that ‘it’ was a ‘he’, he was 3-4 years old, he had been de-clawed and neutered, and he was in perfect health. No microchip. I had been considering putting fliers up in the area but after hearing he had been de-clawed I got pissed and nixed the flier idea. You don’t let a cat go outdoors who has been de-clawed; it is defenseless. Tis extremely cruel. So we went to Petsmart and stocked up on cat goods and now we have a cat.

Sidebar: The Humane Society featured the resident staff cats; one with only one eye and one with only three legs. The one-eyed cat would walk around the whole reception area, checking on people and their pets in the waiting area. Some dude came in with a brolic rottweiler named Barack, a 3 year old grizzly bear sized white bulldog with mange or skin allergies or something kept farting butane blasts, a lady walked around singing Danke Schoen, another lady with rollers and a shower cap talked about how her dog would do anything for some cheese, and there was something in a shoebox.

We eventually agreed on the name Maximus or alternatively, any cunty variation of Max including Maxy-pooh among others. He is VERY vocal, I’m talking 2 and 3 syllable words. You can say “Hi kitty!” and he’ll say “Mraaaoow!” Or he’ll come look at you and say “Oommraooww?” and you’ll say “What?” and he’ll say “Mrraow!” He has different cat words and I’m learning what each mean. This is the first cat experience ever for both of us so we have a lot to learn. Seeing him use the litter box then get out and cover up the “mess” is hilarious. I knew cats were fastidiously clean but man this is high comedy.

He and our dogs are slowly getting used to each other. He and Pookie (the poodle) have a wary agreement worked out and can be around each other; Topaz is still like WTF Mom and Dad a little bit. Max has a BEAUTIFUL coat; he’s a tabby with the white in the front. Golden brown with dark brown stripes. Some of the stripes on his back are more like spots and his head is like a ginger red golden brown color. Clear peridot green eyes.

So all you cat people come in, welcome! Anything I should know? Oh, the first night we had him he meowed a lot (we kept him in a crate) so at 6am Friday (I was off work) I went in there and he got on my lap (on the loveseat) and we slept together like that for 2 hours.

I still wonder if I should put fliers up but I just don’t understand how an indoor cat is suddenly outside out of nowhere in the middle of the night and if he WAS an indoor/outdoor cat I kind of think whoever had him doesn’t deserve him as he was not microchipped, had no collar/tags, and was de-clawed. Iono. What chall think?

And now the pictures!

In conclusion, I would like to again stress the importance  of surrounding yourself with quality people in your life. Here are some of the text messages and FB messages I received:

On what to do with a new cat:

FB friend: fill a bowl with vodka and let it sip on that…it will knock out and then you put it out without a scratch! you’re welcome!

FB friend #2: Love it! And then IDK after that…

Alex: That cat conned yall. He just wanted a place to crash. He’s gonna tear your crib up n blame it on Pookie then rob y’all blind.

Regarding what to name the cat:

KB: Kitty wiggums!

KB: What about Bitcha Bitechoface?

Cas: All time great MLB player Satchel Paige. Because kitty has balls, yo.

KB: Kitty Berray

QQ: Or Lopez Ramirez *my last name*

QQ: All my pets have people middle names so I respectfully suggest Omarion for his middle name

QQ: Oh how bout Tupac Omarion *my last name* a lil bit hard a lil bit bitchass?

FB friend #3: Unity! (You have to have seen the Dave Chappelle/Rick James skit to get that one)

When I showed QQ the pic of the cat laid out her response was: I can’t even understand how Tupac is already laid out by Topaz blankie (so upset that she has deemed him Tupac, oh and Crabby tried to name him Jaws, I absolutely cannot)

When I told QQ I thought the cat was a boy because I didn’t feel any nipples:

QQ: You molested a strange Boycat?…hmm boycatt is a good name

HEY GUYYYYSSSSS

Been super busy. Work. School. Thesis. Papers. Doctoral program apps. Cooking. Twirling. And stuff. Be back next week. Have a funeral and a wedding to attend tomorrow, both in two different cities than the one I am currently in (Marlin, Halletsville, Houston, respectively). Have a magical weekend. Oh, and here are 7 reasons to keep your T-rex off crack cocaine. If you don’t help him/her, who will?

P.S. Here’s a list of things bears love. kBAI.

Warning To My Readers: Never Befriend A Blogger

Ok so I know I gave thanks and stuff a couple of posts ago but I want to recant at this time, my friendship with Karrie B. Bloggies, do not befriend people such as her and let them into your life, e-mail, and phone. Otherwise you subject your inbox to stuff such as this:

The subject title of this picture was: Gem Nomming.

I’m upset at so many things, as discussed with Karrie and QQ. Why does it look like a pony-sized bite was actually taken out of the tomato? Why is she gazing at the tomato so lovingly and smirking about how her lunch has more swagger than yours? The way her pink and white locks are in a breezy fresh roller-set style…

Let this be a warning to those who open your hearts to bloggers. Love is a losing game.

Pink Insects: The Cuntiest in the Land

A boy found a pink grasshopper in a nature reserve recently. Pink insects are rare, but can pop up from time to time. How much you wanna bet they J-set every Friday for no reason?

Pink grasshopper

Pink Katydid

Pink Dragonfly

Peeped here.

Also, have a song to take you through the weekend. I usually don’t like “feel-good” songs, but this one is irresistable with the bass and instrumentation in the background combined with the floaty vocals and lyrics. Turn it up loud and jam. Ok, BAI.

Weather – Amel Larrieux

Dog and Owner in Need

If you guys are animal lovers or even if you can just feel compassion for someone going through a tough time, help out Krystle; aka YoungBlkBeauty (she blogs). Her dog, through some unfortunate events is very sick and she just relocated and took a new job and can’t afford to get him treated and cared for. Those of us who have pets know what dear companions they become and it is heartbreaking when something isn’t right. Here’s the link where you can read the story and help if you so choose.

Poodles n Tumblr n Sawngz

~Poodles have always been among the top 3 smartest dog breeds. This year it has been reported that they are the 2nd smartest breed next to Border Collies, with German Shepherds rounding out the top 3. The article also reports that many dogs have the intelligence of a 2-year old person; recognizing over 100 words and being able to do simple arithmatic. As someone who has a poodle that routinely reads the dictionary for fun, this is not exactly news to me.

Pookie

Examples of the ways my soul has been weakened by having a poodle:

*He knows not to pee in the house. One night years ago, me or Crabby forgot to take him out at night. Around 5 or 6 the next morning, I dimly saw Pookie scratch the bedroom door open, and leave. He came back after a moment and stood in the doorway looking toward us. He then got back in his bed. When I woke up, I noticed he had peed on the trash can and put 2 and 2 together. He had to go so bad but didn’t want to pee in a “bad” area of the apt, so he peed on the trash can. He came back and looked at us as if to say, “I hope you’re ok with what I just had to do.”

*One day years ago Pookie kept walking up to me and whimpering. I had no idea what he wanted, because he had already been outside and I grabbed a toy but he didn’t want to play. So I forgot about it and went back to watching TV/reading. I get up and go in the kitchen and this muhfugga is laid out on his side in a roadkill position in front of his water bowl. He had been trying to tell me to refill his water bowl. This dramatic cunt of a poodle just collapsed in front of it like a dying man in front of an oasis.

*When I get up, somehow he KNOWS if I’m getting up just to get something and sit back down or if I’m about to get my shoes and leave. This is before I go in any particular direction that would give him a hint.

*If our other dog Topaz wants to go out and we’re ignoring her, she’ll go sit by Pookie all upset and Pookie will get up and come ask us for her.

*He knows the phrase “Go tell him, then!” If I want him to ask Crabby to take him out I’ll say “Well go tell him, then!” And he’ll make a funny noise and gallop off.

~I have joined Tumblr and set up a page. It’s really just an excuse to have a dumping ground for my unicorn/cuntiness. I post images that inspire me and songs that are dreamy and jamming. Also lyrics and quotes that stand out to me. I’ve only done a few since I just started, but I’ll be updating frequently. Join me! The Treasure Hunter.

~I’m looking forward to a restful weekend. I started the process for my Masters Thesis this week and that has been a HUGE relief to finally get the ball rolling. We’re supposed to head to a beach this weekend so I’m greatly looking forward to that, as well as another game of Spades (I’m addicted), and a viewing of the movie District 9. To send you off for the weekend, here are a couple of sexy-chill instrumentals that I jam. I am usually not a fan of instrumentals; they really have to put me in a zone. But these two are Gem approved, so enjoy!

Florent 2AM

Cinquo Dias
http://www.last.fm/music/Espresso+Del+Lago/_/Cinquo+Dias